Society needs to realise this.
There's a pervasive notion in society that mothers can do no wrong. No matter how badly a mother treats her child, she is still put on a pedestal. The child is expected to forgive any abuse or toxic behaviour, simply because the mother is the one who gave birth.
From a young age, we are indoctrinated with the idea that mothers are saintly, self-sacrificing caregivers who live only for their children. Movies, books, TV shows, and countless cultural narratives reinforce this myth over and over. A mother's love is portrayed as unconditional, infinite, and sacred.
But what about those mothers who are narcissistic, abusive, neglectful, or toxic? Somehow, their children are still expected to worship them, no matter the lasting trauma. If a child finally works up the courage to cut off an abusive mother, they are branded as selfish, ungrateful, and heartless.
I have experienced this firsthand. After enduring years of emotional abuse, gaslighting, and narcissistic behaviour from my mother, I finally decided to go no-contact for my own mental health. The backlash from society was shocking. "But she's your mother!" "How could you do this to her?" "You're breaking her heart!"
Not once did anyone celebrate the fact that I had broken free from a toxic, damaging environment that was destroying my self-worth. No one commended my strength for prioritising my wellbeing over an abusive relationship, just because it was with a parent.
The truth is, mothers are human. They are flawed, complex, and capable of inflicting serious harm and trauma, even if unintentional. We need to stop blindly worshipping mothers as infallible deities and hold them accountable when they are abusive or toxic, just as we would any other adult.
Children stuck in abusive family situations should not be expected to sacrifice their wellbeing, safety, and sanity at the altar of motherhood. Breaking away from an abusive maternal relationship, no matter how difficult, is an act of courage and self-preservation that should be supported, not condemned.
It's time we stopped blindly putting mothers on pedestals. Their role deserves respect, but not unconditional absolution from all wrongdoing. Children deserve to be celebrated for breaking free from toxic cycles, not shamed for it.
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